My BPD Medication

When I was first admitted to hospital I frequently refused the offer of medication. I believed that there was nothing medically wrong with me, and the only way I could prove that I was not unwell was if I wasn’t taking meds. I eventually folded to the necessity of sleeping pills, mainly because sleeping in hospital is not easy. I also began taking a benzodiazepam, simply because I could. My experience with medication has been very mixed and incredibly stop-start. For varying periods of time I have taken all 4 of the medications I talk about below (actually a low number for many people with mental illness), as well as different combinations. I have learnt that (for me) sometimes medication can help, but also sometimes its okay to take a break and re-stock. In the past I have decided to take these drugs in order to make the people around me more comfortable, in the hope that they would find me more agreeable if I was medicated, and in some cases sedated. However, I am happy with who I am. I can manage mood swings and can enjoy the variation in my personality and even sometimes mood.

Lorazepam

Lorazepam is a benzodiazepam normally prescribed to patients with anxiety or sleep problems. It is also used as a muscle relaxant in hospitals when somebody experiences a seizure. Gamma-Aminobutyric acid (GABA) is a chemical neurotransmitter in the brain. Its role in the central nervous system (CNS)  is to reduce excitability of the neurons, which leads to a reduced CNS response. When your CNS response is reduced, your heart rate slows down and your blood pressure lowers, essentially you relax. Lorazepam blocks the breakdown of GABA to that the concentration of this calming chemical increases, and that you can feel the relaxed effect. Once you have taken lorazepam, you can feel the effects very quickly. I found this drug incredibly helpful, to stop or reduce the effects of a panic attack or situational anxiety quickly and easily. However, after taking it for 4 or 5 months, I began to accidentally overdose when also drinking alcohol. My dose was increasing, and as alcohol is also a CNS depressant this mixture caused some problems for me.

Zopiclone

Zopiclone is the sleeping pill my doctor first prescribed when I was an impatient to help me get to sleep. It didn’t knock me out, in fact they were shocked that I didn’t sleep for about two hours after taking my first dose. Zopiclone boosts the effectiveness of the chemical GABA by attaching to the receptor sites in the brain where it normally works. Although the package clearly says that you shouldn’t take this medication for more than 2 weeks at a time, I was taking it for about 8 months. It was the last thing I decided to stop taking but I don’t necessarily think that it was helpful. Unfortunately they prescribed it to ensure that I would sleep through the night in hospital, however I didn’t suffer from a sleep disorder before. Once you’ve started taking sleeping pills, its really hard to sleep without them. I wouldn’t recommend this medication for the treatment of BPD unless you also have insomnia.

Citalopram

Citalopram is a type of anti-depressant called a selective serotonin re-uptake inhibitor. This means that the removal of serotonin from your brain is reduced, increasing the concentration of serotonin. Serotonin helps to regulate mood, appetite and sleep, and is used as an antidepressant as it brings about feelings of wellbeing and happiness. I was first prescribed citalopram upon my second admission to hospital. It had become apparent that I could no longer put off the use of medication, therefore my doctor and I agreed that an antidepressant would be the least invasive and could really help my depression. I have taken it for short periods of time since then, but I don’t really notice much of an effect. It might increase my general happiness and reduce my impulsivity, but not enough to notice on myself. I might talk to my doctor about trying a new anti-depressant.

Quetiapine

Quetiapine is an atypical antipsychotic medication. It is usually prescribed as a mood stabiliser for people with bipolar or mania, or as an antipsychotic for people with psychosis. However, there has been a lot of research recently about the effectiveness of quetiapine for the management of BPD symptoms, and it looks promising. Quetiapine works by blocking dopamine receptors in the brain, reducing the effect. Dopamine is involved with motivation, emotions, behaviour and perceptions. The reduction of dopamine in my brain caused me to feel overly tired and uninterested in activities. It also lead me to gain weight (a common side effect) which I did not enjoy. The sedative effect helped to stabilise my mood and keep me stable, but having stopped taking it now, I believe that for me and my disorder, quetiapine is not the right drug.

I have taken some information from wikipedia and some from the website headmeds which I really recommend for information about medication and illnesses.

Borderline Bella

One thought on “My BPD Medication

  1. Pingback: BPD; Was I born this way? – Borderline Bella

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